it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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