You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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