playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
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