i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize