You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
