I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize