That's intense
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize