what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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