Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize