Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
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