He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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