As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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