I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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