i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
