So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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