You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize