its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
