For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Randomize
