Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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