lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
