Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
