Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
