Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize