so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
it hurts more in the daytime
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
