Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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