Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
