I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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