it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
