I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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