he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize