he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
