No awkward lesbian experiences without me
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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