Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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