Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
