So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Randomize
