The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
