I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize