This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
