I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
