it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
