All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize