he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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