But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
