Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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