We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize