I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize