no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize