Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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