This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
