There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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