There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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